Thursday, November 27, 2008 @ 5:29 PM
MAA. I'M HOOME..



5days of stress-free living. of shopping. eating. touring. laughing.

Not having to wake up at 6a.m to a day of duty.
Not having to worry about the mounting problems at home/camp.
Not having to wreck my brains thinking of the retarded WITS project that has caused so much problems.
Not having to live This life.

Unfortunately, my new-found freedom died the moment i landed back in Singapore. Well, instructions that came with my overseas leave did warn that any freedom would be short-lived. Still, no harm griping.

In any case, i ventured into foreign territory thinking i'll come back with a truckload of clothes. And i did...smelly used ones that is.

In my defense, clothes sold there ain't much cheaper than the ones sold here. i suppose if i wanted cheap clothes, i would've gone to bangkok or hong kong instead. i did, however, come back with lots of food(:

so forgive me for not returning with a luggage full of bounty.

Friday, November 21, 2008 @ 7:09 PM
Thanks for the well wishes everyone(:

Flying off in a while. My third time overseas. woots!!
i'm feeling the same unexplainable nerves as when i was going to cambodia in J2. I can't quite put my finger on the precise mix of emotions that make up this feeling i've got. Its part loneliness, anxiety, anticipation, fear, excitement and other unknowns.

Perhaps its got to do with the fact that i'm always arriving at the airport alone.

No matter, i'm still leaving anyway and hopefully i'll, as psuedo beyonce puts it, come home safe.

Thursday, November 20, 2008 @ 12:35 AM
When you loved the one that was killing you, it left you no options.
How could you run? How could you fight?
If your life was all you had to give your beloved.
How could you not give?
If it was someone you truly loved.
-Breaking Dawn

Alas, I'm at the last installment of the Twilight saga- Breaking Dawn. Perhaps, not every one's a Shakespeare but the series sure do give people an invigorated, renewed perspective of love. Meanwhile, Twilight the movie is coming on screens 18th DEC. With such reputation, i'm keeping my fingers crossed, hoping the movie will be able to 'pull it off'.
Back in a certain camp, animosity is spreading like wild fire fed by dry wood. Resentment, hostility and even, to some extent, hatred is licking the edges of conversations. There's undeniably a line drawn, a barrier constructed somewhere.
Where exactly? Its hard to quantity. Through the countless misgivings and misunderstandings that went unaddressed, we have created a complicated web of irreversable consequences that has ironically trapped us within.
When did it start? I dig into my memory bank and came up with nothing. We've been feigning ignorance, for the most part but things have been blown way out of proportion. I believe its time we took a step back and look at the situation with an unbiased, unselfish and gracious mind.
Who's at fault? Guess what? EVERYONE. I'll be the first to admit - I'm guilty as charged. No one's perfect, no one's selfless. But there has to be a compromise somewhere. Give and take. That's how the system works, that's how the world goes round.
What can be done? Perhaps it's my wishful thinking to ask that our past deeds be forgotten. But forgiven that's a must, for us to move on. I'm dead serious. There's no purpose in bringing up old stories of what-could-have-beens. It serves no purpose but deepen the animosity.
I'm sorry and embarassed to say, we're a shrewed up bunch of people. But that's life. We make do with what we have and hopefully, hopefully it'll be enough.
Either way, everyone has already became a part of my life. Like it or not, we'll be together for another year. I'll try my best and hopefully you'll try yours. And at the end of the day, i'm praying everyone emerges unscathed.

Sunday, November 16, 2008 @ 6:55 PM
Can I?
Shall I?
Will I?

Self doubt kills. Not quite literally but it does however, cause i hell lot of problems.

In many of my cases, 'will I' often becomes a 'would I have'. I've got to overcome this nasty emotion.

Saturday, November 15, 2008 @ 7:03 PM
because we give a damn...

thanks so much...

for drawing time out from your busy schedules to celebrate my birthday(albeit the lateness) and of course, the presents as well.

for listening to my rambling and woes; it was oddly therapeutic.
i've forgotten how much i love these random talks.

for accepting me for who i am, however heartless, uncaring and presumptuous i may seem.

for allowing me a safe harbour of warmth, reassurance and friendship in my moment of distraught.

and quite simply,
for giving a damn.

all of you are important to me in so many ways. i was suddenly compelled to let you guys know because i so rarely express such feelings openly. hopefully it doesn't scare you guys.