Tuesday, April 7, 2009 @ 1:24 AM
All i wanted was your approbation.
All i needed was your approval.
is that really so hard?

its hard not to doubt sometimes.
not to be selfish and consider what i want.
not to contrive to run away when the means are met.
but worry not,
for the affliction battles itself out within the stronghold that is my mind.
pray; lest the stronghold weakens over time and test.


An ideal concoction of rain and warmth seem to have brewed itself at the gates if Istana.
A calling; for bugs to breed and cause a nuisance to us helpless, immobilised souls. Worms dangle down from tree foliages, hung precariously upon a thread, squirm and swing like a pendulum of sort.
A bite? A prick? I know not much to tell.
A night saw rashes appear in angry red blotches, chasing across my neck.
And for those whose initial expression held more concern than disgust, i thank thee;

Something someone said got me thinking - Am i pampered?
-if i regard SAF ration with disdain. Do i not eat it just the same?
-if i choose to go home given the absolute freedom to. Isn't everyone else, given the privelege, doing so?
-if i abhor bugs and shy away from them with horror. Is it a crime to be afraid of bugs?
I'm sure there are plenty more you could conjure up in your defence but if the above returns are all YES then i seriously urge you to reconsider your notion of what is pampered.
To view people with such condescend isn't very nice.
No. I'm sure i can't argue that point with you(as in all cases).

superfluous talks; i bore- as always.